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You Can’t Judge a Book by the CoverThat old saying can apply to almost anything you care to think of. We all tend to take people at face value and good looking or confident people usually appeal to us much more than dowdy or unattractive ones do. But the sad fact is that crooks and conmen are usually good looking and confident and they gain our trust to our detriment. I’m not just talking about money. You can be conned over anything. The sexy young Russian girl who flatters old men is just one example.I was discussing this online with one of my XHamster friends the other day and it reminded me of an episode in my own life. This took place about 30 years ago. My then wife was having some health problems which the doctor said was related to her use of the contraceptive pill and he advised her to stop taking it. Being a gentleman I offered to have “the cut” and so in due course my local doctor performed a vasectomy. In actual fact my wife, who you will remember was a nurse, assisted in the operation. She said she wanted to make sure it was done properly!!!A few weeks after this operation a man has to provide a specimen of his cum so that it can be checked to see if there are still any live sperm getting through. It is important that the specimen is tested as soon as possible after it is given. Sperm die quite quickly outside of the testicles so if there is a delay it is possible that if any got through they will have died before the fluid is tested. If there is any sperm still in a guys spunk and it is injected directly into a vagina then pregnancy is the türbanlı rize escort outcome. Which of course is not what was required.Girls, you don’t know the hassle all this causes us chaps. Basically we have to attend a hospital or clinic who have the required facilities to test our spunk as quickly as possible, preferably within 30 to 60 minutes.Although my local doctor performed the operation he didn’t have the testing facilities and so I had to travel to a hospital far from where I was living and there I was required to “provide a fresh specimen” – as the appointment letter put it. Let’s not beat about the bush here. I had to wank into a sterile container which would be rushed to the lab and tested before any stray little sperm had a chance to die on me.Having a wank in a room in a hospital when everyone knows what you are doing is a bit of a turn off. Even for a confirmed “cocksman” like me.I was shown into a small room where there were a couple of old easy chairs set by a coffee table on which were some dog-eared copies of Playboy, Penthouse and similar “reading” material.The nurse who showed me in was not the sort of woman to get a guy’s juices flowing. I’m not being ungallant but I’m sure even she would agree that she was plain, overweight and generally unattractive. She explained the process to me (like I had never wanked before) gave me a wide lipped container, and said I should ring the bell by side of the chair when I was ready for her to collect my specimen. The thought of this fat bird rushing türbanlı rize escort bayan my hot spunk through the corridors to the laboratory was rather amusing. “Make way, make way, spunk cumming through.”When she had exited the room I looked around. God it was dowdy. Grey linoleum, green painted walls, and worn chairs. The door hadn’t been locked as no doubt everyone knew what someone in this room was doing, but there was a folding screen just inside the door no doubt designed to provide time to cover up should anyone come in unexpectedly.After half an hour or so of stroking my cock I was nowhere near being able to provide a specimen. It was just a depressing place to be and the soft porn mags weren’t very exiting either. After knocking on the door Marie, the Irish nurse who was in her own words “taking care of me” came in. She stayed behind the screens and asked “how are you getting on?” “Nothing doing,” I said.“Well, try and let me have something soon. If you leave it much longer there won’t be time for the lab to do the tests today and you will have to come back another day.”I groaned. “OK, I’ll see what I can do.”This was such a ludicrous situation and despite my best endeavours and almost giving my cock serious friction burns, when Marie came back five minutes later I had still failed in my task.“Oh dear,” said Marie. “This won’t do at all. Would you like me to help you?”Remember what I said about Marie. Frankly she was as dowdy and unsexy as the bloody room I was sitting in. It was with a sense türbanlı escort rize of foreboding that I heard myself saying “OK, let’s see what you can so. I don’t want to have to come back and go through all this again.”She came round the screen as said “Yes, I can’t imagine anywhere less conducive to masturbation than this place. You aren’t the only guy who has problems producing.”She sat on the arm of my chair and reached down to my sad little cock who had given up on the whole process. When she took me in her hand it was as if an electric shock had shot through me and my cock woke up for the first time since I got here.Marie had the softest, smoothest hands that had ever grasped my dick. Gently she stroked and teased me and my penis responded with enthusiasm. She was both gentle and firm, stroking my balls “let’s encourage as much spunk as possible” and at the same time rubbing her fat soft thumb across the top of my bursting cock head.She softly whispered in my ear, telling me what a sexy guy I was and how any woman would be lucky to have my cock in her. With remarkable skill she brought me to the edge of orgasm and kept me there for a few delicious moments by squeezing me tight to stop orgasm. Then, no doubt with the problem of time in mind, she changed her stroke and suddenly I exploded. She was ready for me and my spunk neatly in the container.“Woops, just got that in time,” she said, “we wouldn’t want to have had to do this again.”“Speak for yourself. You can do that as often as you like.”She laughed and said “I’d better get this down to the lab. When you have cleaned up you can go but I’ll see you again in two week for the second sample.”“I’ll look forward to that,” I replied and she smiled.What is the moral of this story? I suppose I’m saying that don’t prejudge people and their capabilities. Who knows, even an overweight old fart like me might still be able to give you a good time.
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